is it in the water?

Is it the season for time apart? In one week 2 people from work are taking a break from their significant others. I don't think its a bad thing. Gives you some time for clarity; to see the whole picture. I think when you think about the little things they do add up but at the end of the day, but you have to truly think about is why you're together and if you truly love each other. It's very difficult to have balance...to live for yourself and be who you are but also be with someone and share your life. If you go too much in the direction of sharing...you feel like you lose yourself and you forget who you are...you get caught up in the emotional whirlwind, but on the other hand if you think too much of yourself and live for yourself...the emotional attachment starts to feel like it disippates or there is lack of communication. How do people that have been married for 50+ years do it? The same person everyday for the rest of your life, things that drive you crazy about each other...how do you make it work out? How do you make a relationship stay constant and thriving. Its so bizarre because I've loved before and sometimes no matter how much you love someone you know its not going to work, so you make the heartbreaking decision to end it. Its for the best, because you fight too much, or you're not meant for each other or someone didn't love each other anymore. How do you figure out whats worth salvaging or if you should even try. I used to know...I used to be so sure, because I lived for myself and never got too caught up in the emotional attachment and with that came the confidence to be able to say enough is enough. But now...I'm not so sure, but what changed? Maybe I'm too involved that I'm not thinking clearly...but the love feels so good; you feel like everything is right with the world and your walking on sunshine and when its not working it feels the worst; like you can't breath, like your heart is literally sinking. I don't want to be that emotional-less bitch that settles for the person that puts up with her shit and they can handle living day to day not really thinking about each other much...but dealing with what you have and calling it love...

can you find me...i'm feeling lost.

Just Jump!

I thought these images were pretty sweet. I was on www.unkle.com, check it out. I would love to paint my body like that and dance like a snake...haha maybe in another life.

Moving on, so I woke up to morning and did some homework and then I went back to sleep...I'm bizarre like that but I passed out for 3 hours and had the most vivid dreams. I won't bore you with explaining the insanities of dreams...because lets face it dreams are only interesting to the person who has them. So, I was rollerblading with Mochi near a cliff (in my dream)and there was a line of people disappearing down. I thought perhaps people were rolling down a hill off this cliff...it seemed fun, so I went for it and at the very edge I saw that everyone had jumped into a large body of water, so blue and white with the splashes. I just went for it and it felt so real just free falling into water. Now it's a dream...so of course...i could NOT swim, but I knew I was going to be ok...even though mind you I had rollerblades on my feet that would totally sink me. Mochi's ears were flapping in the wind going down and when we landed in the water I grabbed her and mentally told her "Hold your breath!" and we kept sinking and sinking and I couldn't feel the bottom. I was worried but I held my breath for it felt like a really long time and then we resurfaced and we were both fine. I wonder if Mochi ever has dreams about me...like me walking her or petting her....haha! or maybe they are more vivid like mine, like she's flying or something...

So I was wondering if anyone else goes through this, but some phases in the day when you just cry because your sad? I mean...it could be about anything but it's really random. Yesterday I was thinking all kinds of stuff...I'm not good enough, I'm so fat, does he still love me because I'm so emotional. I mean obviously it passed and I just needed to stop thinking about it. When I was walking home from the train I saw a couple on the bridge and he had his arm around her waist and I thought of Ryan. Then I saw him walking up the bridge to meet me because he was worried since I wasn't home right away. It was a really great feeling and all those doubts went away. But I hate when they creep up on me...uninvited...sometimes its best not to act on those feelings...just let them go away. I'm sure others have those weird moments right?

Will you read my blog?

That's the weird thing about blogs...I'm trying to think of what exactly to write about. Should it be only one topic that I talk about to keep it focused (i.e music, art, tattoos, etc.)or should it be my daily random happenings? (which can get rather boring)Maybe my humor wrapped up in all of my writings? Take a vote huh? I can't promise my blog won't be full of adult content...i could talk about anything from poop, sex, or furry bunnies. You need to highlight poop and sex in the same sentence...it's rather hilarious isn't it. Or disgusting if a porn spam pops up on your screen...then not so funny.

Let me know what you think and READ IT because I said so...haha.

-I'm Linda Wong...nuff said...that's the URL...genius ;)